Warning: Patients with known sensitivity to craziness should not use this product, as it contains trace amount of nuts.
product description/ profile
No artificial flavourings, colourings or preservatives! (yeah, right.)
Product ID: Tan Hui Tian Type: Female Date of Manufacture: 19.10.1991 Made in Singapore
Ingredients: Chinese, Cynicism, Cyberworld, Cookies, Candies, Chocolates, Cyan 539 (may contain trace amount of soy lectin and nuts)
Storage: Please store product in a cool, dry place. Once opened, consume within 28 days.
Warning: Product is flammable. Keep out of children's reach.
If you have any queries, feel free to contact us at tanhuitian.at.hotmail.com.
Thursday, December 24, 2009
11:14 PM
1. I feel awkward and threatened by bright, charismatic high-achievers, and yet, slightly awed by their mot juste verbiage display. I can only be eloquent behind the firewall, with my fingers poised over the keyboard, pausing every few seconds to think, consulting the thesaurus and spell-checker at every turn.
2. I hate to be in the spotlight, even though by imitation and repetition, I’ve come to do well in it. I’d much rather be a wallflower, faded into the background, a poltergeist of sorts, the ears of walls.
But I’ve unlearnt the ability to haunt conversations, and instead I blend into the white noise, slightly aware that I’m talking, but not knowing the words I speak. I know I will forget the conversation, the names, the faces. And I only feel guilty about being apathetic about my apathy.
3. I wonder if it’s alright if I’m incapable of falling in love – the hard-striking descent that features so much in soap operas and tragic love stories. The closest thing to love I feel is a remote feeling of gentle affection, and the sound of a comfortable silence.
And if it’s not, then it’d surely be a hard habit to break – this monastic dreary solace wound intricately together like a ball of gossamer threads.
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"I hate those I, I, I stories."
11:11 PM
A tightly-wound tin soldier, clattering across the front lines with rickety steps. He stops without warning, exhausted to the last coil, but without a sweat. I wind him up again, watch his back disappear as I follow wearily behind, hoping we will find no man’s land this time.
Monday, November 30, 2009
11:44 AM
Currently attempting to install the Wacom driver on school comp. Not sure whether it'll even be successful. But damn, school connection sucks.
Saturday, November 14, 2009
4:56 PM
An independent anime production by an animation student:
There's no subs, but the dialogue is minimal anyway. If you want the loose translation, here's what a commenter posted:
girl- ” um um… please go out with me!” boy- ” sorry, I want to focus on baseball now” girl-” Takashi is stupid!” “Takashi !?” ” ILL MAKE MISO SOUP FOR YOU EVERYDAY!” boy(takashi)-” sorry, I want to focus on baseball now” END
This Ishida Hiroyasu guy is 21 years old, and obviously has a pantyshot fetish. But barring that, damn, the animation is real good.
Sometimes I wish I were an animation student too, but then again, I wish I were a veterinarian, a patisserie (though I can't cook well), an astronaut, a hikikomori, a cat, etc, too. To be honest, I don't quite mind flipping burgers for the rest of my life either, if I can draw in my free time.
But I digress.
Friday, November 06, 2009
7:35 PM
M: "Desire and dreams are odd things. Surprisingly, we are not necessary happier when we get what we want. Sometimes wanting alone sustains us - studies show that after a year, neither the paralytic nor the lottery millionaire are happier in regards to each other. Sometimes we are happier not getting the girl, but chasing the girl. However, when desire becomes obsession and we do not fulfill that want, we are left deeply dissatisfied. If that is so, I am content with merely velleity and a simple, austere life."
E: "They say the poor man is happier than the rich man, but I don't think that's true at all. Happiness doesn't lie in poverty. After all, who would be happy not getting what they want? I say, if you want something, go get it! Why hesitate? Why procrastinate? Life is too short for us to agonize over such stupid things. Live fast, die young, and leave a good-looking corpse. I mean, why take life so seriously? Nobody comes out alive anyway. I don't want to die a sad and bitter old man, regretting about the things I have not done. I want to live every second of my life, as if I'd be dead the next second. So come on, Carpe Diem!"
S: "I wonder if it's a bad thing to fall in love with pain, and hollowness and melancholy and awkwardness and ennui and longing and all that nasty feelings? Like the intrinsic phenomenon of teenage girls falling in love with bad boys knowing they would be hurt, or the act of self-harm for no particular reason. Is it a way to mask emptiness by seeking out the extreme? Perhaps, humans by nature are self-destructive. Neither the ascetic or the hedonist derives happiness from what they do, or don't do. Happiness, is ultimately, a state of mind...?"
6:07 PM
"I'm at my happiest when I know I don't make sense, and yet I know you'd understand anyway."
"She thinks the greatest love is left unspoken, but I can't help it anyway, so I whisper 'I love you' whenever I think she's not looking." "He thinks love should be proclaimed at the top of your lungs, but I can't help it, so instead I trace the words 'I love you' on his back whenever I think he's sleeping."
List of favorite things:
printed words on yellowed books (because they are like precious thoughts entrapped in the fibers of paper)
tiny raindrops on window panes
kneading warm dough/ clay (that don't stick to your hands)
the smell of fresh vanilla
the way some cats would follow you so close to your heels you would inadvertently trip over them if you're not careful
the way some cats would eye you suspiciously and run and hide behind a wall if you come too close
when you successfully sneak up on a cat from behind
masking your footsteps
when babies laugh
reading a good book in one sitting
holding your breath in shallow water
reading on the toilet
singing *loudly* while bathing
cold showers
bitter tea
lighting a matchstick
hugging your knees so close your heels touch your butt
laughing evilly to yourself for no apparent reason
movie marathons
drinking 1.5l of water at one go
drinking directly from a 1.5l bottle
eating a sashimi buffet
watching horror movies and trying to get a nightmare by rerunning it in your head
getting nightmares
getting very very bizarre dreams and being able to recollect it vividly
dreams in technicolor
dreaming in words
not sleeping for 24 hours
sleeping for 24 hours
cycling for 8 hours straight
screeching like a banshee, and getting praised for it
climbing a tall rock wall, or a tall fence (idiots like high places)
biting people and letting people bite you (eh, sadomasochism much?)
reading/ watching a really really tragic story/ soap
masticating (chewing gum, tough beef, or your own arm when in dire need)
binging on alcohol and not getting drunk
trying to read faster than you possibly can
just swinging a brush around and making random marks
deliberately breaking something
eating weird food (like snails and wasabi and raw prawns and crickets and so on) (even if they taste nasty)
just typing on a keyboard/ piano thoughtlessly
being in love without falling in love
Thursday, November 05, 2009
8:48 PM
I'm happy to announce that the shower in my house broke.
Now, if only that means I can skip my baths...
Anyway, just for laughs - this video cracks me up:
Friday, October 16, 2009
1:21 AM
Week 27-30: 12-3 Expressive Illustration 03-18/1
Week 31-34: 12-3, 3-6 Book Illustration 04-46 Publication Design 06-06/A
Week 37-40: 9-12, 12-3 Model-Making 01-19 Digital Illustration 04-24